One might be hard pressed to believe my humility. Grandiose is what we sell, after all. Settling for any less would simply be a disservice to all. Nonetheless, I will be first to admit that the breadth of my wisdom is far lesser than what might present itself. That, in itself, is not a humble act – I know I know nothing.
Acts, however, are perhaps not the goal of this editorial. I simply aim to redeem the past in what little ways I can.
I bring to you, then, not a moral teaching, not a lecture, but a few simple lines of advice.
Be kind to yourself and others. Strive to better yourself. Remember to rest.
Above all, stay true to yourself.
Art of London
Waiting for the sun in a stolen city
Elections Begin Tomorrow!
Tomorrow at noon, the official electorial season begins! Candidates reveal their platforms and campaigns, secret hunters shall aim to properly do their job.
Our own Gazette brings you a survey of popularity – let us see who has the most support! As there is a whole week of campaigning before the next edition comes out, do not be afraid to mail us when you are sure of your answers!
Find the survey at the middle page spread, and send it to us at the address provided at the back of the paper.
News of Art, Art of News
Journalism Of Smears Running Rampant
It is our own displeasure to bring your attention, dear readers, to the dishonesty and slander that still course through the veins of London’s journalist community. What’s more, it seems that not even our own humble paper can escape such conflicts.
A so-called “defender of truth” that is the Phlegethonian Gazette seems to disagree with our efforts to bring London’s artistic community closer together. If such an attack would only be to our paper itself, we would not bat an eye; Lord Gazter, the owner and chief editor of the Phlegethonian Gazette, however, seems to take it upon himself to slander even the community itself!
To call contemporary art “dull, dreary, and otherwise lacking [a] spark” is perhaps the most blatantly blind blabber dear Lord Gazter could come up with. One might even think that he does not even read The Goosey Gazette! For if he did, not only would he see that the art of London is vibrant, overflowing with creativity, and full of heart, but that the powers that be are not always kind to the artists that such art make!
Perhaps that is where the issue lies. After all, our own Gazette must sometimes be distributed through secret channels and allied distributors in the artistic world, lest the Ministry confiscates further copies of certain editions. As Lord Gazter is who he is – namely, a lord – it is only reasonable that his access to the finer editions is restricted, if not non-existent. Worry not, dear readers, as we have taken it upon ourselves to educate Lord Gazter, and will be mailing all redacted copies directly to his estate.
As apolitical as we try to be, dear readers, it seems that it is time for actions. As The Tentacled Entrepreneur’s candidature has been announced with a platform of patronage for the arts, a spark of hope arises. We at the Gazette firmly believe that it will be only beneficial to the more marginal forms and ways and themes of art.
Tomorrow start the campaigns, and with the Entrepreneur’s further agenda, we ask you, dearest readers – support the Tentacled Entrepreneur! Support Axile, support art and the Arts!
Ask Mother Goose
Dear Mother Goose,
Oh my tired bones, bury me deep and leave no mark.
Wishes may be for all, but their fulfilment is but for the damned.